Alexandra has to do her physical therapy exercises 5 times a day and even though she has been strong throughout most of this trial the home exercises do not seem to be a strong point.
I usually try to put the more positive things in here, the things I want for our family to remember for the years to come, but I think that it is important for us as we look back, to remember that the trials in this life, even the miracles, are not without natural strain.
The other day Alexandra was, oh let's say, less than charming as she got angry with me for pushing her too hard. Her fingers hurt, she wants them to work now, she is frustrated with the activities she cannot do with her siblings, frustrated by the time she has to put in doing what should be such a simple task. She is a strong girl but lets face it, this stinks. I know that we are learning and growing so much that when we look back we will be able to clearly see how this experience has benefited our whole family. I think it is also important to accept that sometimes it is hard, that we feel weak and tired, and we cannot control all that is before us. This is what humbles us and when our children's children read our journals they will be able to see that we are still people with weaknesses that have witnessed the great things that our lives offered us despite our shortcomings.
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I think Alex's scars, as small as they now are,will always be a symbol of her miracle. The priesthood blessing, the doctors and attendants who spent ages preparing to be allowed to serve people who experienced such traumas, her parents and brother and sister, her own consistent diligence in taking care of herself--almost a thank you note for her healing. I am so thankful, so thankful for her blessing of healing.
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